May 25, 2001 @ 9:30 PM

Well I really don't like libraries all that much and during my four years at Iowa State University I tried my hardest not to enter the library at all, but unforunately due to class work I was forced to go there about twice a semester. So now your wondering, "Why doesn't he like libraries?" "Does he not like to read?" "Does he have a severe fear of paper cuts?" Well neither of these is the case, but I do really dislike paper cuts as a matter of fact. The reason I hate going to the libraries is because librarians are the direct spawn of satan. Okay well now you're thinking this guys is nuts. Librarians are so old, sweet, and helpful. They probably remind you of your grandmother huh? That is exactly what they want you to believe. It is also exactly what I though for awhile until I began to notice a trend when I went to the library. Everytime I tried to find a book the computer system said it was available, but when ever I went to find it, it wasn't there. I decided there was only one possible solution to this. As I was finding the book I wanted in the computer system, the "librarians" were watching over my shoulder to see what book I was looking for. Then once they got the title they would run like hell and go hide it before I could find it. Now normally and old person couldn't run that fast, but if a librarian was a spawn of satan then they would have unbelievable amounts of speed.