Ask Andy! - Issue 5, Series 1 - June, 1998

Ebonics and the end of civilzation

Dear Andy:
Why are so many people so stupid?

Dear Anonymous:
First of all, an elaboration on your question seems in order. It's not that there are stupid people everywhere, but merely in this country. Not only do we test out stupid, but we tend to brag about our stupidity by popularizing poor grammar with ebonics, and stating with pride rather than shame or envy that we suck at math. (Unlike myself. I say it out of self pity.) Only in this country is stupidity worshipped. That is your answer. The reason there are so many stupid people is that we live a stupid culture. There's nothing we can do until the country collapses like Rome, and society tries to rebuild it self from scratch, failing due to the fact that without modern agriculture and transportation, we will all die.

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